• Many thanks to everyone that made it to the Awards night last Saturday, a particular thanks to those that really made the effort with their attire on the night.


    The happiest B&F winner of all time




    Robbo and his ladies taking a break from presenting ‘The Price is Right’


    Nick, Snipper and a guy dressed like Luther Vandross’  bedroom

    Congratulations to all the winners – particularly Snipper for taking out the B&F, Dutchy for Most Runs, Chef for Most Wickets and Saul for the Bravery award (for agreeing to a second game against Seymours on Lydiard!).

    Other Award winners included:

    • Champagne Moment – The Rev (for leaving the field of play, missing a catch and refusing to field the ball while drinking prosecco with some spectators)
    • Dwayne Leverock Award for Best Hands – Tuesday
    • Ryan Mitchell Award for Worst Player at the Big Day Not Out – Ryan Mitchell
    • Best Player at the Big Day Not Out – Dutchy (not for his 1 run, but for his sledging)
    • Best Player on Tour – Mo (for getting our bond back)

    A great night was had by all and here’s looking forward to next season!

  • The Jugged Hare had the honour of holding London’s premier social event of the year, The Quokkas CC Presentation Evening 2014. A small, yet select, list of guests were entertained in the usual manner with tales of sporting ineptitude on the pitch and one or two stories of actual cricketing prowess, punctuated with a smattering of awards for outstanding contributions to Quokkadom this season.

    t20 Award: Dr Martin


    Andrew Smithers Champagne Moment: The Skip for arguing with a greek man


    Quokkette Award: Slick for general lady entertaining


    Egg Bravery Award: Belinda for baby life saving at the Ashes

    With points awarded for each match, the race for Best & Fairest was wide open again this this year with a number of Quokkas vying for the major prize of the evening. Once the reckoning was reckoned, his satanic majesticness Evil Dave emerged victorious for his role as this year’s leading wicket-taker and pinch hitter extraordinaire.


    Darkness rises

    A smattering of season statistics for the data junkies among you

    Results: Played 9; Won 3; Lost 6

    Highest Totals:

    • Quokkas – 216/5 vs Salix
    • Opposition – 237/7 Barnes Common

    Lowest Totals:

    • Quokkas – 101 ao vs Whalers
    • Opposition – 85 ao Hartfield

    Most Runs: Conan The Destroyer – 128 @ 25.6

    Highest Score: Gladys – 78 against Salix

    Most Wickets: Evil Dave – 9 @ 14.9

    Best Bowling: Mr Saucisson – 4/14 against Hartfield


    • Evil Dave overtook both Shandy to move to 5th on all time leading run scorers (572), and The Egg to move 2nd on the wicket takers list (46)
    • Faggy snook past the Praying Mantis to move to 3rd top career batsmen (741)
    • Tom the Yak powered past The Attack and Binman to reach 4th on the career bowling stats (37)
    • Slick played his 25th game in Quokka Colours
    • Mr Saucisson retired back to the colonies from with the superb record of Played 11, Runs 168@18.7, Wickets 19@9.0
  • And so another season of un-entertaining cricket for the Victorian (Labour in Vain) Quokkas was crowned with an entertaining evening of celebration in the manner only known as THE GOWNLOWS.

    Taking up residence in the Grace Darling Hotel, the second-oldest pub in Melbourne, in the very room in which the Collingwood Football Club was formed, the Quokkas celebrated their own recent season with a count of the votes given, match reports read and awards presented for outstanding efforts.

    Highlights of the season were also observed, including the $5,000 raised for charity (Kickstart for Kids and the McGrath Foundation), the match against the Victorian Blind Cricket Association and of course the match against The Pinnacle Hotel (our win!).

    Joe “Lonely” Miller-Norman ended up taking out the Best & Fairest Award on a count back, after initially polling the same number of votes as Pup, though receiving more 3 votes for the games he played in.

    Bad luck to Pup, though he has years to exact revenge.

    Bad luck also to Ed, who now has to listen to Lonely bang on about this win, as well as the “Mighty Teal“.

    Other winners for the evening included:

    • Most Runs AND Most Wickets: Ed
    • Best Player at the Big Day Not Out: Robbo
    • Worst Player at the Big Day Not Out: Phantom (also picked up the award for the most runs against in an over; 28)
    • The Sledgehammer Award for Sensitivity: J Rod
    • The Zoe Goss Award for being dismissed by a female: Emu
    • The J Rod Death Bowling Award: Curto (for being hit for 14 runs off 3 balls to lose the game with an over left)
    • The Bruce Reid Award for Batting: The Rev

    Thanks everyone for a great season, here’s looking to season 2014/15.

  • Sandwiched in between all those Christmas parties, the real highlight of the year was the Quokkas 2013 presentation evening. Despite a few last minute dropouts – you know who you are – a record attendance saw MC Skip chair proceedings on the review of those rarest of events, a Quokka winning season.

    Award winners on the night:

    • T20 Award  – The Mantis for services rendered
    • Quokkette Award for best in field – Lord Faggy Frumkin Jr for services to ladies
    • The Andrew Smithers champagne moment – Arunav for 108* and retiring before he beat Skip’s all time club record
    • The Egg Bravery Award – Nicola for heroics in the face of some tough Aussie mental pressure during the Ashes

    MC Skip


    Slick and The Voice favour sartorial elegance over a tan


    The Attack enjoys his own annecdote


    Mantis looking dapper


    Arunav’s acceptance speech as long as his innings


    Quokkarette Award presented by kylie


    Quokkette Award winner Faggy shows his victory face


    Most Losingest Quokka Captain ever, Snoop Robby Rob accepts his cap


    Never interrupt Mr Saucisson mid-sausage

    The main award of the season went down to the last game with 5 (Five!) Quokkas in the running for The Rev. Tom the Yak finally took home the shield after leading the Quokkas in wickets and some fine innings with the bat also. Commiserations to Evil Dave, Mr Saucisson, Conan the Destroyer and Faggy Frumkin Jr who were all in with a chance in the most open competition ever

    Tom receives The Rev

    Tom receives The Rev

    Thanks to all the Quokkas and Quokkettes who made it a memorable evening

  • This is what the ladies have been waiting for, a Quokka event that doesn’t involve sitting around watching Quokkas making fools of themselves….. Wait a minute, this is a Quokka social, there is bound to be some tomfoolery.

    And the Quokkas weren’t too foolish in the field this year, a winning season for the first time in Skipper’s memory.

    This is when we find out the answers to the big questions:

    • Will Faggie hold onto the Best and Fairest? Doubtful
    • Will Verger still have gout? Probable
    • Will Slick get the snake suit out? Possible
    • Will Conan wear a bowtie, Qu’est-ce que c’est ? Definitely

    Date: Saturday 7th Dec
    Venue: The Queen & Artichoke, Great Portland St
    Time: 7.30 for 8pm sit down

    Dress code: Jackets, ties and fancy dresses for the Aussies (and ladies)

    Any questions, give Skip a shout.

    ps Will send more venue details out near the time.
    pps Faggie, please give Skip the trophy back.


Recent Comments

  • Strong.
  • Proper swing bowling that was. Pitch it up.
  • Fabulous article which made us smile in the Spanish sunshine...
  • You forgot to mention Harry getting to bowl an over aswell. ...
  • Please see point 5.