• The most Quokka of moments

    No caption needed

    From Captain Ed…

    The sun was shining and while we were missing  a few of the Quokkas A-listers in Snipper, Dog and Chef, a find of L7’s Bricks are Heavy Album on Cassette in the shed Sunday morning had feeling it was going to be a good day.

    The Rainbow batted first and the Jay/Dutchy opening partnership yielded 2 wickets, Jay doing all the yielding. James (Alex’s brother) bowled first change on debut and learnt that bowling line and length leads to nothing but dropped catches at slip. Rev was the other first change bowler and started his spell with a few wides……

    Day Two

    Rev completed his 16 ball over and I had to drag him as a second over would have resulted in dehydration of the fielders waiting for the drinks break. Rainbow only 66 at drinks. I mentioned to Local on the walk back out that they key was getting through the period where we tend to drift and concede a few runs….that key was still under the mat. The rainbow got to 171 with the highlights of the second set of overs being Alex bowling leggies and landing them,  Radars two stumpings and the captain being questioned about his third over by two veteran quokkas after an unlucky 2nd over went for a few.

    The half time feast was amazing, 4 types of meat, fish and salads to challenge the Dogs culinary skills.

    The batting order was drawn from a hat and after dismissing Dutchies protest that 11 was actually roman numerals for 2, Local and Radar got us off to a flyer, 40 off four overs before Radar was caught hookin’ which he walked off sookin’ and kind of disappointed lookin’. Local retired for a dashing 32, Rainsey 15 (all to backward square), Jay 30 odd, Shane 30 less, Me, a Captains knock 0f 35, Tuesday hit the winning runs and we were home with an over to spare.

    Went back to the Rainbow anyway for a few beers, questions on the necessity of the length of Jay’s run up, discussions on what Alex sleeps in when his favorite shorts are elsewhere and queried the selection process for the captain of mixed team 2.

    And that’s about all. There was something else, but its slips my mind….Oh yeah, that’s it… ENTER THE REVEREND!!!!!!  26 not out, 32 balls, 5 off drives, highest pub league score, guiding us home for Victory.  Yes it happened and we were there.

  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, February 14

    Ramsden Street Oval, Clifton Hill

     

    Time:

    1pm

     

    The Big Picture:

    This will be the Quokkas first Pub League game for 2016, discounting the Big Day Not Out, and one that they hope will start better than 2015 ended (1 win from 4 Pub League games).

     

    This is the first time the Quokkas have played this incarnation of the Rainbow Hotel, the last time was c.2010 before the last incarnation went on to being Sentido fUnf (then the Fitzroy Beer Garden, then The Marquis of Lorne).

     

    Here’s hoping the new mob are as uncompetitive at cricket as the old mob were good at moving pubs / bars / wine bars.

     

    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas have only won the one game this season, against the Old Bar, which was highly reliant on the big hitting of Chef (44 off 14) and J Rod (41 off 24).

     

    Of course neither is available for this game, which leaves more of a crater than a hole in the run-scoring department.

    Crater

    Artists impression of the Quokkas run scoring capability

     

    That being said, the Quokkas did bowl and field in their last showing (at the BDNO), bowling out the Standard in 10 overs. Shame they couldn’t chase the runs.

     

    In the Spotlight:

    Tuesday is in sparkling form this season, averaging 86 with the bat in the Pub League, as well as scoring a handy 59 against the Vic Deaf team before I ran him out. You’re welcome.

     

    Jay and Local can expect a good go with the new ball on Sunday, combining for 7 wickets for 144 runs. This might not sound world beating, but you have to remember that many of their deliveries are just too good for the batsmen to hit.

     

    Team News:

    Snipper was an early withdrawal from this game due to a bad case of ‘somethingbettertodo’.

     

    Thankfully Alex’s brother John has slipped straight in, bringing some handy seam bowling as well as a touch of the Steve Henty’s. That is, better looking than his brother and more loved by his parents.

     

    The XI at the time of writing and in no particular order is:

    1. Ed (c)
    2. Dutchy
    3. Local
    4. Alex
    5. John Gow
    6. Radar
    7. Rev
    8. Nick AW
    9. Tuesday
    10. Jay
    11. Bowl’en

     

    Pitch and Conditions:

    This is the Quokkas first venture back to Ramsden Street Oval since the first game of this season, a narrow loss to BDNO winners The Royal Oak.

     

    A ground with potentially long boundaries, depending on where you lay the witches hats, as well as the calming sounds of cars rushing along the Eastern Freeway.

     

    The new practice nets at the ground, described by some as the best in the Southern Hemisphere, provide tricky complications in regards to making excuses not to warm up. Well, for those inexperienced at making excuses anyway.

     

    The ground is also the site of where one of my deliveries was once hit into a light tower, which was a little like that scene in ‘The Natural’, but without Robert Redford or baseball.

     

    Stats and Trivia:

    • You should know by now that I’m making up 67% of these and sometimes 81%, or 23%
    • Dutchy has now hit 22 career YPCA 6’s, the equal most of all time (with Rowdy), this game offers his opportunity to take the lead
    • This will be Radars 25th YPCA game for the Quokkas, the inked-up all-rounder (bats, bowls, keeps) has scored 284 runs at 14.95 (top score of 37) and 11 wickets at 24.64

     

     

     

     

  • From Captain J Rod….

    We came, we saw, They Conquered!

    In our 3rd annual game against the VBCA, we headed south to RM Lord Park in Carnegie.

    With the sun shining, we arrived to the site of Chris the umpire setting up on the turf pitch which excited some of the Quokkas.

    With the VBCA team choosing to bat first, the Quokkas took the opportunity to refresh/learn the rules and practice their underarm bowling.

    As Captain for the day, JRod opened the bowling to opposing captain Dave who hit the first ball back through his legs to get the VBCA team off to a flying start. The openers put on a great unbeaten partnership before retiring to give the other batsmen a bit of a hit.

    With some good fielding by Cat, Rainsey and Nick and some bad “Dad” jokes from Rev, Rainsey and Umpires Chris. Along with a couple of shared wickets between Mia, Shotgun, Rainsey we briefly slowed the runs. Very briefly, the VBCA gave us a huge target of 170+ in 20 overs.

    Opening with Tuesday and Mia we got off to a good start. Until Tuesday ran Mia out going for a run that just wasn’t there. Mia gave Tuesday a one finger salute which received a huge cheer from the Quokkas sitting on the boundary.

    This had Cat in at number 3 who put on a quick fire 11 before she was walking back which was followed by a middle order collapse. No one else reach double figures until Dutchy joined the Red Hot Tuesday who was quickly approaching his half century.

    Dutchy was unstuck by a brilliant piece of fielding by Robbo (Not our Robbo, that would never happen.) who ran a stunned Dutchy out with a direct hit from near the boundary.

    With Tuesday now passed 50, in great touch. The VBCA had no answer to his scoring. With Tuesday at the crease, we still have a chance of Victory.

    But wait, here come Rev at number 10, who strides to the middle confidently, then quickly runs Tuesday out, and with that any chance of winning.

    Rainsey in at 11 at one end, he managed to make double figures for the first time and his highest score playing for the Quokkas.

    At the other end, with the Quokkas needing over 30 runs an over, Rev was blocking them out nicely. With 57 needed off the last over, Rev was still trying to hit the winning runs, sealed with an attempted ramp shot off the last ball.

    The Quokkas fell 51 runs short of Victory but a great day was had by all. We hope the VBCA got some good practice and we wish them all the best in their upcoming 40/40 and 20/20 competitions at the end of December and early January.

    Squads

  • The Quokkas headed off to the hilly and leafy surrounds of Doncaster this Sunday gone for a practice match against the Victorian Deaf team, ahead of the Deaf Cricket National championships in Adelaide this January.

     

    To define it as a practice match was quite fitting, the Quokkas were practicing playing cricket, while the VDC team practiced executing their skills against slowly-moving targets.

     

    With the good people at Fitzroy-Doncaster CC generously daonating a glorious turf wicket for the game, it was always going to be a challenge for the Quokkas to adjust to variable bounce and movement off the seam; things not really seen off the true bounce you get on Pub League synthetic pitches.

     

    Also going against the boys in Maroon (apart from their opponents being good at cricket) was that this game was played under established T20 rules (e.g. wides, no balls etc).

     

    Needless to say, E Xtras had a fine match.

     

    Working for the Quokkas, though, were their imports from the VDC; James and Tony, both of whom had outstanding matches.

     

    The other positive from James & Tony playing for the Quokkas, was that Dutchy and J Rod played for the VDC, not that it was all good news…

     

    With Fitzroy-Doncaster scheduling lunch for us at 1:30, the Quokkas elected to let the VDC bat first, so as to ensure we’d make it to the break.

     

    Tony opened the bowling for the Quokkas, and immediately forced all of the fieldsmen to take a few steps back due to the pace he created.

     

    With every other bowling option literally arriving at the ground in time for the start, Tuesday was also given the new ball & was given some punishment despite some very good deliveries.

     

    Snipper & Jay were then brought on, with Snipper bowling with heat and efficiency down the hill, while Jay bowled 4 excellent overs of bounce and swing up the hill for a reward of 2 wickets.

     

    Artists impression of Jay

    Artists impression of Jay

     

    Chef also had success bowling his darts up the hill, while The Rev delivered a “Rev Classic”; an over of head-high full-tosses, in-swinging yorkers, a wicket (thanks J Rod) and finally him breaking down completely with a bad back & going off.

     

    The remaining bowling overs were completed by Keegs (subbed on for the Rev) and Alex, whose bowling may or may not have been impacted by his big win during the week.

     

    Congrats mate

    Congrats mate

     

    At the end of their batting innings the VDCA had put on 162, which didn’t seem that bad after them being 0-47 after the first 4 overs.

     

    The lunch spread was delightfully received, with further delight being shown by the VDC guys when they realised the Quokkas were drinking beer between innings.

     

    The gospel of Pub Cricket isn’t going to spread itself you know.

     

    The Quokkas started their batting innings strongly, with Curto and James from the VDC leaving the good balls (which was most of them) & hitting the bad ones through the gaps.

     

    They then decided to hit some of the good ones through the gaps too, as scoring more runs than the opposition is a more-proven way of winning a game of cricket than playing “good ball, bad ball”.

     

    Getting a little too aggressive, Curto managed to find a way to run James out, bringing the Big Dog to the crease.

     

    Being a particularly poor cricketer, there are few moments that I can actually savour or look back on with untainted joy in my time with the game, but shooting The Big Dog out for LBW on 0 while umpiring this match is one of them.

     

    Curto followed the ‘Dog back to the pavilion / toilet block soon after, bringing Bowl’en (Shane) to the crease.

     

    It’s still to be proven that Shane is a pub cricketer, he does drink a lot of beer & is great for a yarn, but he insists on playing proper shots through the off-side.

     

    As a result, he found this (proper) bowling to his liking & swiftly moved to 11 before being dared into playing a leg-side shot (by Dutchy) & popped one back to the bowler.

     

    I believe you could hear Dutchy’s laugh in The Hague.

     

    Alex also showed the benefits of patience & proper shots, before being stumped off a Jaffa

    Not actually part of the game

    Not actually part of the game

     

     

    Keegan was unfortunate to go Caught Behind for a Duck, the wicket keeper didn’t hear the knick (obviously) until the umpire told him.

     

    You’re welcome Keegs.

     

    At 6 for 66, the Quokkas were either in a Metal Band or a world of trouble.

    It was the latter.

     

    Thankfully, a procession of Tuesday (18), Chef (24) and Tony (33) brought the game all the way to the last ball of the match with 1 needed to tie, 2 needed to win and Chef on strike.

     

    I won’t go into the details of whether the last ball was a wide and didn’t need to be hit, or whether it was caught behind, or whether Chef was also run-out, but the game ended with the Quokkas being 1 run short of a tie.

     

    It was a great game in all, played in a wonderful spirit, apart from Dutchy nearly laughing himself to death after getting Tuesday out & Tuesday taking a risky run with a call of “come on, its just J Rod fielding”.

    Seen here, Dutchy and Mike Whitney

    Seen here, Dutchy and Mike Whitney

     

    Thanks very much for the VDCA for the game, as well as Fitzroy Doncaster CC for being such great hosts.

     

    teamshot

     

     

     

     

     

  • pogonophobia  /p?g?n??f??b??/

    extreme dislike of beards

     

    The natural habitat of the Quokka is northside inner suburban Melbourne. As we have tired of our surrounds the quest has continued to find new locations to spread the quokka legend. This year’s tour game took us far from the hipsters and skinny jeans of Fitzroy to the Gippsland countryside. Stories abounded that our hosts Nerrena had the only other ex-hurler Irish cricketer playing in Victoria. Someone other than Big Dog with a single cross-batted shot and an unorthodox bowling action? That alone was worth investigating further.

    The preceding week was spent with the squad oscillating from 13 down to 10 and with a couple of late additions we had 12 to play. On winning the toss our hosts decided that the decent thing was to give us the choice in any case and so it was that the Quokkas were set to bowl first. Snipper and Eliza arrived rock-star late but our hosts were happy to hold off the start. There was significant net activity and youthful exuberance by our opponents whilst the Quokka pre-match routine consisted of cracking open a few cold cans. All the warning signs were there you might say.

    The innings in the field started well with Ed and Chef keeping it tight. The Nerrena captain poked and prodded to 13 as wickets fell around him. Big Dog had a bowl and that little Waterford versus Kilkenny duel ended honours even. The Quokkas rotated the bowlers and Chef, Alex, Jay and Local all picked up wickets along the way. Impressive catches for Local and Alex off steepling shots and an uncharacteristically generally attentive fielding display left us with a gettable 117 to chase on the wide expanses of the fertile Gippsland dairy paddocks.

    Pretty great.

    Pretty great.

    The sun beat down with lazy sense of optimism at the innings break and all looked well in the world for the Quokkas. An early dismissal for our debutant Ian was followed by a solid partnership of 44 between Alex and Dutchy. Big Dog joined Dutchy to take the score to sitting pretty on 2/64 off 11 overs. But being the Quokkas calamity was never too far away and Big Dog, Snipper and Jay departed in the 12th over leaving us reeling.

    That triple wicket maiden was the turning point from which the Quokkas never recovered. Dutchy was out for 49 and Bowl’en, Cath and Ed couldn’t quite get us there despite some lusty blows in the last few overs. The Redcaps skipper showed his versatility with a spell of death bowling to clinch victory for his side. So in this particular Irish civil war it was keeping with the pattern of history as once again black and amber ruled supreme over white and blue. Tiocfaidh ár lá.

    Thanks to Brian for organising and for the whole club at Nerrena for hosting us on the day. It was a measure of the enjoyment from our side that when a return game in Melbourne was mooted one of the recently defeated Quokka batsman quickly added “stuff that, we’re coming down here again”. Big Dog retains the anti-Midas touch with a perfect record of 4 losses from 4 games as captain. Surely Winston Churchill had the Quokkas in mind when we said “Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm”.

  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, November 22

    Fairlea East Oval, Yarra Bend

    Time:

    13:00 EST

    The Big Picture:

    For a team that prides itself on participation over a focus on wins and losses, this season has been a real winner for the Quokkas. Going into the game with only ten available to play after 3 steady losses, the saggy maroons are in top form to play a team new to the YPCA league.

    This version of the Old Bar is new to the competition & little is known about their cricketing or drinking prowess. I’d like to think they are a rag-tag bunch of plucky misfits, but maybe that’s because I’ve been watching The Goonies again.

    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas go into this game still winless for the 2015/16 season, having snatched defeat from the jaws of victory in their last game against the good folk in Nerrena.

    In the Spotlight:

    Tuesday comes back into the team at the top of the order with his big-hitting housemate, the Quokkas are hoping that the man under the ink can bring some more big runs to start the innings.

    After opening with Dutchy last week, Alex helped put on a 44 run stand & also bowled his customary deep, deep heat – though without the short balls. If he can keep this form up, he could well go home with a firm piece of plastic in his hands on Gownlow night.

    Team News:

    After the rush to play at the start of the season, the Quokkas only have 10 available for match day at the time of writing for the second week in a row. With several on standby, we should get the XI up fine.

    What could possibly go wrong?

    Absolutely nothing.

    Absolutely nothing.

    The Ten at the time of writing is:

    1. Pup
    2. Curto (c)
    3. Dutchy
    4. Local
    5. Tuesday
    6. Tuesdays housemate (man Friday)
    7. Chef
    8. Alex
    9. Jay
    10. Nick A-W

    Pitch and Conditions:

    And so the Quokkas trek back to Fairlea East, the home of knee grazes where backpackers go to disappear. Also the home of Shotguns 30, its truly the modern Bermuda Triangle. The ground is likely to be dry with a fast outfield, have no running water available or toilets. What a glamorous life these Quokkas lead.

    On the plus side, its only going to be 21 degrees.

    Stats and Trivia:

    • Incredibly, Tuesday and Chef both sit on 142 runs off 9 innings with 3 not outs each – for a matching average of 23.67
    • Tuesday has, though, taken 13 catches – better than 1 per match
    • If Pup should bat in this match, it will be his 20th innings for the Quokkas. He has scored 248 runs (9th highest) @ 19.08 for his career and taken 17 wickets (4th highest) @ 15.12 (so far)
  • From Captain Local….

    “The only things that are certain in life are death and taxes”, said someone who had obviously not picked up Dennis Rodman’s autobiography Bad As I Wanna Be and experienced the clear insight that this was indeed a book that should be judged by it’s cover and left unread.
    To this list of certain things can be added “catches win matches”.
    Fairlea West is a hard place for a gentle game. You go there without hope, because in a place like this hope gets sucked down to the dirty river along with the rest of the rubbish, and who’s got enough of it to spare? The freeway cuts a canyon behind the ground, the toilet block is locked (whether to keep you out or to keep something worse in) and running water is like human kindness in the rush to secure an overhead locker on the Tiger flight back from Bali – nowehre to be found.
    I heard a story once about this kid who used to wash dishes at a greasy spoon on Smith Street, back when you had to watch out that junkies didn’t steal the spoons, greasy or otherwise. He played in a punk/polka 5-piece called “Zombie Arse” and had some connections with a group of anarchists who ran a popular underground chess night out of a mouldy squat near Victoria Park. This dishwasher punk-rock anarchist kid took some bad acid one night and ran off up to Fairlea West, trying to shake The Fear. There on the narrow, mean strip of concrete that gets called the pitch, The Fear caught up with him. That kid is an old man now, living behind the torn and tattered flywire door of a one-bedroom flat in Thomastown, and his neighbours know to ignore his panicked cries in the night.
    The Quokkas batted first against the Curtain (The Beefies) and with solid contributions from most everyone – Tuesday and Dutchy the retirees – posted a competitive total of 7/174. After an excellent  lunch effort from Radar and Smallgoods on the bbq bike, we returned to the field and held the Beefies tightly until the drinks break. That is not a euphemism.
    However, it may be that The Fear still lurks among the yellowing grass up there at Fairlea, and all it takes is a couple of loose overs, some balls falling into empty space where a fielder should be and a catch or two going through hands for the tables to be turned as if they were specifically designed to do so, perhaps because they have been made for a catering or functions company that requires that capacity in a table.
    Several massive sixes and some traditional Quokka overthrows later and it was handshakes and congratulations all round for The Beefies.
    Nonetheless, it a testament to the Power of Cricket that this game was played in a spirit very much at odds with the brutalist surrounds. I mean, it could be that maybe the surrounds are actually not that brutal. Maybe this report is overstating the influence of the ground on Quokka fielding. Maybe there is in fact no evil malingering influence that lurks at the ground. Who knows – not me, I am not a Ghostbuster. I do know however that –  much like the type of idealised love that Paul Young and Zucchero long for in the sometimes overlooked hit Senza una Donna – when cricket is played as it was here then winning and losing simply become abstract concepts with which to illustrate, rather than define, the game.
  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, November 15

    The ground is on Nerrena Hall Rd a short distance west off the C454 at Nerrena.

    Start Time:

    1pm

    The Big Picture:

    It is with great excitement that the Tour match for the 2015/16 season has come upon us.

    While the tour match is normally the first game of the season and/or a good excuse for the team to get away together to see some of the sights of this fine country (e.g. the Barossa Valley, the Tay valley, Ballarat), this years looks to be much more low-key with the vast majority of the team heading up on the morning of the game itself.

    The highlight from Ballarat

    The highlight from Ballarat

    This may be due to increased parenting duties by the majority of the team, or the organizational abilities of the tour organizer (the Big Dog) or a combination of the two.

    Most likely the latter though.

    The game against the Nerrena 3rd XI is a welcome opportunity to travel to Gippsland to take in the famous hospitality of the region, the South Gippsland rail trail, the tourist railway and (possibly) the Mirboo North brewery.

    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas are going into this game with a winless record for the 2015/16 season, going down to the Royal Derby by 10 runs then the Curtin Hotel by 8 wickets last week.

    Also going against the boys in maroon is that this game will be played using normal T20 rules, so there will be; LBWs, first-ball outs, Wides, Extras and other rules that go against the pub-cricketers norm.

    Its not-not cricket, I tells ya.

    Little is known about the form of the Nerrena 3rd XI, largely as a combination of laziness on my part, as well as their Facebook page being a closed group.

    In the Spotlight:

    The Big Dog goes into this game as Captain, being the organiser of the game. The Veteran is in mixed form so far this season, cracking some late-order runs (including a scintillating hockey-paddle six into the carpark) against the Royal Derby as well as taking a wicket in that game. His game against the Curtin wasn’t as successful, yielding 8 runs and his 2 overs going for 14.

    His cricketing nous and experience is likely to be tested to the fullest this Sunday with the LBW rule in play, as well as a fleet of bowlers used to playing with no ‘Wide’ rule. More important still will be his recruiting ability to get a full XI up in time.

    The man is an excitement machine.

    The man is an excitement machine.

    Dutchy has started the 2015/16 season in promising big-hitting form, with 60% of his runs coming from boundaries (48% fours, 12% sixes). With the opportunity to not be asked to bowl in this game, the man in the van could seriously gather some votes & keep them.

    Team News:

    Unlike the previous 2 matches, the Quokkas only have ten good men and true available for this game at the time of writing. Given that we had 12 available on the Monday before the last game, 2 pull out before the weekend, yet managed to find another 2 – we should be OK to put forward a full XI. That being said, its very likely the majority of the team still hasn’t realized the game is in Gippsland and may pull out due to conflicting Soccer / live Gig / hair washing interests.

    The Ten at the time of writing is:

    1. Big Dog (c)
    2. Ed
    3. Bowl’en
    4. Dutchy
    5. Chef
    6. Snipper
    7. Jay
    8. Alex
    9. Local
    10. J Rod

    Pitch and Conditions:

    Very little is known about the pitch at Nerrena, but being Gippsland you can pretty easily bet that the ground has seen a fair amount of rain since the last ice age.

    Artists impression of Gippsland in Summer

    Artists impression of Gippsland in Summer

    The Quokkas are hoping desperately that we aren’t playing on turf. Wet weather, turf and shoes without spikes make for an interesting game (as the Bushrangers recently learned).

    Its set to be a sunny 21 degrees in Melbourne on Sunday, so may hit the heights of 19 in Nerrena.

    Stats and Trivia:

    • Given that this isn’t a YPCA game, the stats won’t count come end of season time, though they will be recorded;
    • On the YPCA stats, J Rod has now bowled 58.5 overs, the most of all time…behind only Ed (85.1), Dutchy (71), Big Dog & Emu (63), Robbo and Rev (59);
    • For his efforts, J Rod has collected 16 wickets at 21.25, going at 5.81 RPO;
    • While the Quokkas mostly use the internet for geo-caching and other nefarious purposes, Tuesday has generously set us up with an Instagram account! Look us up at QUOKKAS_CC

     

  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, November 8

    Ground TBC

    Start Time:

    1pm

    The Big Picture:

    I’m going to just put this out there…the Quokkas love the Beefies.

    One of our longest-standing opponents and a great bunch of blokes to boot, there has been some cracking matches and moments between the two teams, not least the Beefies first-ever Pub league win!

    Other moments of merit from previous Beefy-Quokka encounters include Rowdy’s 87 off 23 balls (not mentioned in Eds book), Revs cover drive off one knee, Chefs 3/18 off 3 and the time Dutchy (while captaining) pleaded with the team for one more wicket – when the game was already won.

    Good times.

    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas started the 2015/16 season with an honorable loss, going down to the Royal Derby by 10 runs.

    Given that the Derby’s opening 3 put on 116 runs after 13 overs with the rest putting on 57 in the remaining 12, and the Quokkas had a much more even performance (only 1 retiree & 7 wicket takers).

    It’s a good sign from the boys in Maroon & form that will be needed to battle the high-scoring & hard-drinking “BEEFIES”.

    Little is known about the BEEFIES start to the season, though it almost certainly involved a Ford Laser, a case of Fireball and the girls from the Playboy 2015 Calendar.

    What happens in the Laser, stays in the Laser

    What happens in the Laser, stays in the Laser

    In the spotlight:

    Local is coming off arguably his best performance as a Quokka, with 37 not out, 2 wickets and 2 catches (we won’t mention the drops). In the spirit of reactive field placements, we have made him Captain for this match.

    The quietly conquering Chef clocked up his 10th YPCA match for the Quokkas last weekend, and another wicket in the process. Our Kiwi-import has been smiling from ear-to-ear since the All Blacks won something on the weekend, one can only hope he continues his sleep-deprived & excellent form.

    Team News:

    For the second week in a row, the Quokkas look like they will have a full XI come game day, with the added bonus of a possible 12th man available on the day. Unheard of.

    The availables (at the time of writing) are:

    1. Big Dog
    2. Ed
    3. Dutchy
    4. Local (c)
    5. Tuesday
    6. J Rod
    7. Snipper
    8. Chef
    9. Bowl’en
    10. Jim
    11. Jay
    12. Pup?

    Pitch and Conditions:

    As of 6 days before the match, I still haven’t been told where the game is. Any insights would be really, really great. The good people at the Bureau of Meteorology tell me its going to be at least 27 degrees, so a pleasant afternoon wherever we are.

    Stats and Trivia:

    • Chef played his 10th YPCA game on the weekend & took his 12th wicket in the process. His average of 10 runs per wicket at 5.22 RPO is simply startling
    • This weekends match will be Snippers 10th, the man in new trousers currently has a batting average of 60.33
    • Along with taking a sensational catch last weekend, Dutchy also scored his 600th run for the club (the record). The man in orange has a batting average of 26.09, with 10 not outs, 55 fours and 21 sixes. Don’t ask about his “bowling” (aka. Throwing) average
  • Many thanks to everyone that made it to the Awards night last Saturday, a particular thanks to those that really made the effort with their attire on the night.

    IMG_1652

    The happiest B&F winner of all time

    IMG_1645

    Clowns

    IMG_1657

    Robbo and his ladies taking a break from presenting ‘The Price is Right’

    IMG_1647

    Nick, Snipper and a guy dressed like Luther Vandross’  bedroom

    Congratulations to all the winners – particularly Snipper for taking out the B&F, Dutchy for Most Runs, Chef for Most Wickets and Saul for the Bravery award (for agreeing to a second game against Seymours on Lydiard!).

    Other Award winners included:

    • Champagne Moment – The Rev (for leaving the field of play, missing a catch and refusing to field the ball while drinking prosecco with some spectators)
    • Dwayne Leverock Award for Best Hands – Tuesday
    • Ryan Mitchell Award for Worst Player at the Big Day Not Out – Ryan Mitchell
    • Best Player at the Big Day Not Out – Dutchy (not for his 1 run, but for his sledging)
    • Best Player on Tour – Mo (for getting our bond back)

    A great night was had by all and here’s looking forward to next season!

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