• Match Facts: Sunday, January 29th 2017, 454 Glenferrie Rd, Kooyong

    Time: 1pm start

    The Big Picture:

    This weekend marks the Quokkas annual match against the Victorian Blind Cricket Association (VBCA), an event that we are very proud of and happy to play each season.

    The VBCA are coming off a very busy Christmas break, with the State Team coming off an intensive T20 Championship and many of the National players in India for the World Cup.

    The Quokkas, on the other hand, have started 2017 by being carted around Alfred Crescent by the ASRC and dropping more than a few catches along the way.

    This game will be played as a T20, with retirements, LBWs and other such rules in place.

    This game lets The Quokkas the ability to experience the game in the way vision-impaired players do, while also giving the VBCA players an opportunity to have a hit.

    Form Guide:

    As mentioned, the VBCA are coming off a very hectic schedule, so are probably in great form and ready to tee-off against some very muddling bowling. The Quokkas have managed to field a full XI for every game so far this season, which is at least 1 positive.

    In the Spotlight:

    J Rod comes into this game fresh from dropping a quarum of catches, scoring 30+ runs off not many and generally being so laconic that sloths look at him enviously.

    A comparative excitement machine

    A comparative excitement machine

    Captain for the game against the VBCA for the second year in a row, J Rod will bring the rat cunning he developed growing up in Moree to the field.

    Eliza comes in for her 3rd Quokkas game, including her 2nd against the VBCA. A wicket taker in last years game, the underarm specialist could be a real handful in this match.

    Team News:

    The XI for this weekend (at the time of writing) is:

    1. The Big Dog
    2. Cat
    3. Dutchy
    4. Bowl’en
    5. Chef
    6. Snipper
    7. Radar
    8. J Rod (c)
    9. Ren
    10. Karly
    11. Eliza
    12. Rev *

    * Expected to be calling the game for most of it

    Pitch and Conditions

    It doesn’t get much better than the lovely fields at Kooyong. The pitches are well kept and manicured, and the bar in the pavilion is both conveniently close to the players benches and full of cold beer. The bar staff can be pretty hot on opening times, Rev experienced their discipline a few years ago first hand, so be sure to wait until midday to ask for your first cold one.

    The BOM is predicting a top of 28 on Sunday, which is the kind of weather that really works up a thirst when combined with running around in goggles.

    Stats & Trivia

    • This is the 4th match between the VBCA and the Quokkas, the VBCA hold a 2-1 lead in the ledger
    • Big Dog, J Rod and Rev have all played the most number of VBCA games; 3
    • This match will be Dutchy’s 60th appearance for The Quokkas, here’s hoping he bring some CHEEKY GOAT ice cream to celebrate
    • Karly should be making her debut this week, which is very exciting. Karly has shown great promise in the nets & we hope she can become a key part of the mixed team going forward
  • Sunday 15th January 2017 saw the Quokkas take on Asylum Seekers Resource Centre in what has now become a highly anticipated annual fixture.

    With the Quokkas on BBQ duty and batting first, Local courageously faced up to 2017’s most fearsome opening over to date. Four balls later the pads were off and he was firing up the BBQ. Ed joined Big Dog at the crease and after 5 overs they were dug in like an Alabama tick with a run rate which projected an innings total of about 17.

    Alabama Tick

    Alabama Tick

    Big Dog eventually fell for 11 after seeing off the nastiest of the bowlers and Ed set about rectifying the mostly binary scorecard by unleashing a flurry of boundaries off the back foot, retiring unbeaten on 27.

    Dutchy came to the crease and bludgeoned 27 from 14 with support from Rania who was eventually run out at the non-striker’s for 2. Nick A-W didn’t put a foot wrong and kept the score ticking over, retiring unbeaten on 20, and it began to seem as if a competitive total wasn’t completely out of the question.

    With J-Rod at the crease a run-fest ensued as he belted an unbeaten 32 from 14 balls. However, with simultaneous retirements for J-Rod and Nick A-W the innings came to a screeching halt.

    The Captain’s (middle stump) knock(ed out of the ground) unfortunately saw the Quokkas worm plateau just prior to which Rev ran down the pitch and covered the most ground for a dot ball in the history of cricket.

    A large amount of running for no reason

    A large amount of running for no reason

    As the innings wrapped up with Rev and Tuesday unbeaten on 5 and 4 respectively it looked to be a tough total to defend with the Quokkas limping to 129 off the 20 overs.



    Rumour had it that some of the ASRC players were keen to wrap the match up and head down to the MCG, so you didn’t need to be Hari Seldon to predict what was to come…

    Boundaries. Lots and lots of boundaries. Most of them found their way to the fence, or over it, via J-Rod who had replaced Tuesday at deep mid-wicket (perhaps 2017’s most disastrous captaining oversight) however some cleared the rope so comprehensively, as in Jay’s second over which went for 17, that fielding was simply made redundant.

    The highlight was Rania’s over which claimed 50% of the wickets taken and resulted in the team’s best figures of 1/6.

    Somewhere around the 14th over the Captain had to find a way to relieve J-Rod of his fielding position while preferably avoiding the obligatory criticism from Dutchy for reactionary field changes… “So alright J-Rod, time for a bowl.”

    Somebody, maybe Bid Dog, yelled out “bring the field up, save the single” and, as the captain was trying to comprehend why in blazers we would do that, the ball once again sailed over the boundary at mid-wicket and, seemingly out of nowhere, that was the end of the match.

    As it turned out, the ASRC had good reason to steamroll the Quokkas in a hurry as Pakistan pulled off their first win at the MCG in 32 years. Congrats Pakistan and the ASRC!

  • The Gaso Quokkas hit the e-news stands this week, with media darling Dutchy facing up to the big questions again:


  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, January 15th 2017

    Alfred Cres



    12pm start – not 1pm!



    Modified T20 Rules:

    • No LBW
    • No out on first ball
    • No dangerous balls (bouncers at the head, full tosses above the waist)
    • No wides (bowl again with no penalty)
    • Everyone bowls 2 overs (keeper can opt out)
    • Batsmen retire at the end of the over they reach 20 runs



    The ASRC is looking for Donations to help its on-going programs, if you are able, please bring along any of the following to the game and we will make sure it gets to them:



    The Big Picture:

    Welcome to 2017. For those that missed 2016, The Quokkas played cricket in Sri Lanka and Australia, played mixed games, pub league games, games against blind and deaf opponents, and had a thoroughly good time all-round.


    The first game for the Quokkas in 2017 is the annual match against the Asylum Seekers Resource Centre (ASRC) at Alfred Crescent Oval, one of The Quokkas favorite opponents at one of their favorite grounds.


    This game allows the Quokkas do what they do best, which is provide the opportunity to smash some fairly terrible cricketers to people that normally don’t have the chance to.


    The corresponding fixture last season saw a fairly comprehensive defeat for the Quokkas, with one of the ASRC batsmen scoring a handy 50 after scoring an unbeaten 100 in a match earlier that morning. Fair effort.


    Regardless, this game is pure Quokka, providing a game of cricket to those that may otherwise not have the opportunity. Many thanks to the good people at the Yarra Pub Cricket Association for organizing the ground.


    Form Guide:

    To be perfectly honest, the Quokkas are in pretty ordinary form this season.


    They won the first game of the season before losing the next four, though not all by the widest of margins.


    While in good form with the bat this season (6 players average 20 or more), the fielding has been the let down, particularly the catching. It’s a good thing we don’t count drops as my abacus doesn’t go that high (it’s a crapacus).


    20 catches have been held in 4 YPCA games this season, but at least that many again have gone down. The ASRC would do well to aim at the fielders, or the fielders hands if possible.


    In the Spotlight:

    While not leading the club for Runs (with 58), strike rate (1.04), or wickets (2), Ed is the leading catcher for the season with 4.


    Shame on all of us.


    He will be looking to take his good form from last years game against the ASRC, where his Tony Greig-inspired helmet was debuted to good effect, enabling him to hook bouncers from in front of his face over the fine leg fence.

    Artists impression of Ed sans-helmet. We really need a new artist.

    Artists impression of Ed sans-helmet.
    We really need a new artist.


    Cat comes in for her third game of the season, batting in Big Dogs place, enabling him to focus on adding to the wickets he has snared this season.


    Cat is possibly one of the best placed to face the ASRCs fast bowlers with her excellent technique, and should benefit from the short boundaries; 36% of her YPCA runs come from fours.


    Team News:

    The XI for this game (at the time of writing) is (in no particular order):

    1. Ed
    2. Big Dog / Cat
    3. Dutchy
    4. Tuesday
    5. Ren
    6. Local
    7. Snipper
    8. J Rod
    9. Rev
    10. Jay
    11. Nickname AW


    Pitch and Conditions:

    While Alfred Crescent is a lovely spot, surrounded by parkland, laughing children and working toilets (a miracle in the Pub League), it is also the size of a postage stamp.


    This usually means less running for the batsmen, but it is a risk with the ASRC batsmen seemingly able to hit the boundary just by taking guard.


    Expect a lot of runs and dead possums.


    Its supposed to be 26 degrees this Sunday with the chance of a shower, so anything could happen going by the weather so far this summer. Expect 20 metres of snow and a possible sharknado.

    Still better than facing the ASRCs quicks

    Still better than facing the ASRCs quicks


    Stats & Trivia:

    • This match will be Big Dogs 65th appearance for The Quokkas, easily the highest among the uncommitted cricketers in maroon
    • It will also be a milestone game for Snipper and Nick, their 20th and 15th appearances for the Quokkas respectively
    • The Big Dog is averaging a wicket every 2.39 overs, so it’s a shame he will only get the 2 this week
    • After breaking his season drought in the last game with 2 wickets, Jay moved into the 11 wicket club with; Mo, Radar, Robbo and……Snipper
    • Other notable 11s include Big Dog (again) who has 11 not outs and Nickname AW who has 11 innings
    • Local is (characteristically) a man-apart with 12 wickets
  • Scaff says "relax"

    Scaff says “relax”



Recent Comments

  • Strong.
  • Proper swing bowling that was. Pitch it up.
  • Fabulous article which made us smile in the Spanish sunshine...
  • You forgot to mention Harry getting to bowl an over aswell. ...
  • Please see point 5.