December 4, 2016
Fairfield Cricket Ground
The Big Picture:
This is the tenthy-second time that the Quokkas have taken on the “Beefys”, or very close to that figure indeed. This preview has gone over historic matches between the two clubs in the past, so I wont revisit that.
The main point is that this game oft-represents all that is good in pub cricket, and all that can be good in this world again.
The Beefies, with or without the Ford Laser, are a great group of lads and the Quokkas always look forward to getting to know the Beef Curtins a bit better, particularly after they are nice and moist after a day in the field.
After winning their first game of the season in a thriller, The Quokkas have lost the last two in relatively convincing fashion.
The last loss was against a combined Nerrena squad that featured a young blonde all-rounder about whom Dutchy astutely observed; “he looks like a female Russian tennis player”. Unfortunately for the Quokkas, he grunted as well as he bowled, batted and fielded and was a big part of the difference between the teams.
As good as the Quokkas fielding performance at Nerrena was, the Quokkas still managed to put down a number of catches, something that helps you win…something. Apparently.
In the Spotlight:
James Gow is a welcome addition to the team after a 12 month absence spent finding inner peace in a dilapidated RnB club in downtown Kilmore. James brings much needed disciplined bowling to the Quokkas, with a career RPO average of 5.67 and a bowling average of 17. For those that are interested, this is much lower than his brothers average of 21.17.
Local gets the Captains Jacket this week (it turns out the Big Dog has been holding on to it for reasons unknown), which is kind-of like giving Donald Trump control of the Worlds largest economy. Very similar in fact.
Local is coming off a great game with the ball (3 overs, 1 for 17) and bat (17 off 7), his batting innings in Nerrena including some of the more outrageous shots ever seen in South Gippsland. It was similar to Captain Kirk exposing the white-skinned people to the Enterprise at the start of “Star Trek: Into Darkness”.
With the greatest recording studio in Melbourne, 400 Acres, having its Christmas party this Sunday, the Quokkas are suddenly short of many of its famously stable 2016/17 squad.
Thankfully, we know others who can actually play and are available.
The XI, at the time of writing, is:
- Dutchy (w/k)
- J Rod
- Big Dog
- Local (c)
- James Gow
- Nickname AW
Pitch and Conditions
Formerly a regular ground for the Quokkas, Fairfield Oval has now become the forgotten school friend that you bump into irregularly and promise to catch up with, but never do.
The ground has become a smooth, green carpet since the drainage has been fixed, unless the soccer team has been on it first – in which case it is a cabbage patch.
Its expected to hit a top of 32 degrees on Sunday, which should be great fun to field in first. There is supposed to be a late shower in the day, which may help the team bowling second, which just happens to not be the Quokkas.
Stats & Trivia:
After updating the database at Quokkas HQ to include mixed games, some of the appearances data has changed, so apologies for any confusion here:
- This match will be Chefs 20th appearance for the Quokkas, the broad-chested legend took out the bowling award in his first season and has 16 YPCA wickets at 15 to prove his (Kiwi) chops. Throw in his 220 runs at 24 and you get to understand the value he brings to the team, without even mentioning the Pinot Gris
- On the subject of Bowling-award winners, Jay is has sent down 6 overs in the YPCA this season at a cost of 33 runs (5.5 RPO) without luck. He has taken 9 wickets for 151 runs in his career so perhaps he should let the Dog out and go a bit more vertical?
- With Ed out, Dutchy has the opportunity to extend his lead for all-time runs over Ed, which currently stands at 1. Should he do so, it will probably be via going big, Dutchy scores 60% of his runs from boundaries (40% fours, 20% sixes) as opposed to Eds 48% (33% fours, 15% sixes)
- Bowl’en was a little hard on himself on hitting 7 last weekend, but it was consistent. His career average in the YPCA is 6.44. The long-limbed, guitar-picken man is a real nurdler, challenging the Rev for runs scored off boundaries (21% v 23%). Neither has hit a six.