• We only had 8 players, not even enough to write the match report, and if we had another couple could have had some more batting to support Conan at the end and may have made enough runs.

    As it was the St Anne’s batsmen had enough men to see them to the finish despite Hairdresser’s bowling assault on the lower middle order.


  • To make sure that we make the most of the beautifully long British summer we’ve added another fixture to the list. This one will be Sunday July 28th against a new oppo and at a new venue. The Badgers cc will host us on Hampstead Heath (Parliament Hill). It promises to be a fantastic venue and a nice one to bring supporters along to.

    Just to add to the excitement I have re-arranged the Tusmore game to 4th August (to accommodate Loc’s Wedding)

    Can you all let Skip/Binman know if you can play at Tusmore and vs The Badgers…. should be sunny by then!

    Tags: , ,

  • Steve the Pirate covets Conan's Jugs

    Having starting the day with chocolate cake for breakfast, I knew it would be a good day.

    Satan revved up his Audi Quattro and the Quokkas set off on the annual trip to one of the highlights of the year, Wantage away. The lack of rock on the radio slowed down Evil Dave’s machine, but this mattered not as arriving at 1.30 there was a gaggle of Quokkas but only a pair of Wantagers.

    Skip negotiated the toss and put Wantage into bat. Freshening up the bowling, Faggie Frumkin Jnr Earl of Worcestershire opened up with Satan. A good opening spell by both slowed the progress of Wantage. The usual Wantage heavy hitting not happening due to craft and guile by the bowling duo with a wicket a-piece. This was followed up by Tickets, who had just sobered up from the previous weeks free drinks with supermodels at Whiskey Mist. 2 for 12 off 7 was just reward, following softening up the batsmen by trying his own style of bodyline. The Voice, Professor and Skip keep the runs down and Yak cleaned up with 2 for 10. 187 was 20/30 less than par and could have been even better for the Quokkas if they had held their chances, 6 catches going down.

    Confidence was running through the Quokkas veins. Tickets was talking himself up again, so he strapped on the pads. A quick fire 29 opening with Faggie, including a huge 6 into the gardens setup the run chase. With 2 quick wickets Guru and Conan entered the fray. Conan slashed at a wide ball early and their keeper dropped a dolly…. “Make him pay Conan” was the cry from Skip…. and so he did.

    Guru started to stroke the ball all around the ground and once again looked like the batsmen that the Quokkas thought they had poached from Isis. He was complemented by Conan clubbing the ball to all parts. Various ‘Arnie’ impressions resulted on the sidelines. Eventually Guru slapped the ball down mid wickets throat for a cracking 44 but the 90 run partnership had setup the win. Knacker Pete and Skip came and went and a Quokkas collapse was possible but Conan was not to be denied. Clubbing another couple of fours he raised his bat to celebrate the win and a fine 69 no. A new hero was born.

    A great 5 wickets win and cracking hospitality once again by Wantage. It was a good day out.

    Bon Jovi was belting out of the Quattro on the M40 home and a great day was had by all. More cake, less push-ups says Skip.

    Tags: ,

  • Quokka's "YMCA" moves needed some work

    Quokka’s “YMCA” moves needed some work


    The Skip turned in probably one of the best all-time Quokka bowling performances to sink Salix on an overcast and windy day at the QPR training ground in Harlington (Yes I know that is football, but you do get the opportunity to park in old bagpuss’s spot). The first five-for in a Quokka shirt since the Fatman in 2008, including three wickets in four balls,  put the brakes on a spirited Salix response to a competitive first innings total of 179 by the boys in the tight maroon.

    That first innings score seemed a good one as breaking with tradition the Quokkas played their best batsmen up top – first Skip and Mr Saucisson, with 23 and 30 respectively, then a thirsty pairing of Lord Faggy Frumkin Jr and the Hairdresser got themselves in and accelerated to a useful total. No way was there any implication that this was mainly as they didn’t want to take the risk of running out of partners which could happen if you bat lower down for us.

    An unusual occurrence in Quokka circles these days, us visitors were only 4 down at the close of the first 35, with Ches and Conan the other willowsmiths. Tickets didn’t even have to rise from his pitchside post-hangover slumber.

    This was probably for the best – his opening spell of bowling went for plenty as the Salix batsmen set about the Quokka total. Tom the Yak, opening at the other end, bagged the first wicket but was also seeing his good balls despatched to the boundary by the dangerous Spurr in at first drop, until the match-swinging bowling changes were precipitated by the previous night’s drinking. Tickets, feeling worse for wear, took himself off and this brought about the double change of the Mr Saucisson and the Skip.  Bowling into the wind Sausageman bamboozled the remaining opener with one that swung from outside leg to take off stump, and then the Skip did the business, Salix tumbling from 70 for 1 to 90 odd for 8 in short order.

    After some overs by Ches and Slick, The Egg and Knacker Pete – with his first Quokka wicket – mopped up the tail and capped a fine performance in the field with no dropped catches and some splendid takes from Conan behind the stumps. The Skip remarked that “we looked like a proper team” and he was “looking forward to beating Wantage next week”  which just goes to show what a difference a win makes.

    Edit: Salix have embraced the digital video age and some highlights can be found here A particular highlight at 00:45


  • As the sun finally appeared in 2013, the Quokkas made the short trip down to Barnes Common to take on new opponents we randomly met in the nice pub in Barnes a couple of years ago. The Skip lost the toss and fielding was the order of the day, with Evil Dave and Faggy Frumkin Jr III Earl of Worcester opening the attack with the pink ball and claiming a wicket a-piece.

    Runs were flowing for Barnes even as wickets kept regularly falling as Skip and The Voice bagged another 3 between them, one a proper cricket looking wicket as the batsmen edged a fine deliver to Bradley Sr at keeper, though the Barnes no4 was still occupying his end of the crease.  He then started taking the third string Quokka bowlers apart with more sixes than this correspondent can ever remember seeing in Sunday social cricket on his way to an unbeaten century. Tom the Yak did manage to take three of their lower order in compensation as Barnes finished on a strong 206/9 after the regulation 35 overs.

    Like a rat out of a trap the Quokkas raced to 73 without loss at a rate well above the required asking; Arunav and Skip taking apart the opening bowlers from BCCC. However when Skip fell to a dubious LBW (good umpiring there Voice) and Arunav just fell short of his 50 it all went a bit Pete Tong as 7 (seven) of the remaining Quokka batsmen failed to trouble the scorebook. Only Evil Dave managed to salvage some pride with a typical big hitting 23 until he holed out going for another lusty blow. All out for 109 from 73 for none was the very definition , if not intention, of many a Quokka innings.

    We then retired to the nice pub in Barnes with the homemade Scotch Eggs to recruit some of the Barnes lads for our T20 team.



Recent Comments

  • The burning question. Will co-captain Ami get to lose the to...
  • Absolutely brilliant Chez! Loved reading this and look forw...
  • Nice. Stop
  • Gidday.....Veterans Cricket Victoria { Aust } h...
  • The blood of my wicket is purely on the captains hands. That...