From the mind of Emu…
Much like Edward Smith (don’t google it, he drove the titanic) I like to
think my Captaincy be judged by the highlights rather than the end result.
Put into the field by Needling Nick, the captain of the Sub-Standard
(because at 1:00 they had 9 blokes) it became clear that he was a little
bit precious in slagging off Luke Curtain for bringing an esky that
I could say that he was an anal retentive, medial job working control freak
with poor social skills whence combined with low sporting aptitude means he
treats Sunday cricket with a degree of pettiness usually reserved for
sociopaths who commit postal murders, but that would not be nice.
So, off to field in 36 degree odd heat we did start a little shaky. Their
top order was strong; which had Captain Emu scratching his head.
Fortunately, much like Celine Dion, you know they have to retire
eventually, but it doesn’t help you in the meantime. Most bowlers got some
treatment. Much like Robbo who went for 22 off one over. His revenge would
Daniel “Ming” Grigg created some great tension, the boy from Torquay a
frugal threat (1 for 10 from 3 overs) Luke Curtain passing the gloves to
his brother and bowling two overs (1 for 9) was handy before drinks. Rowdy
also showed his volleyball skills; a perfect set saw him push a catch
neatly over the boundary. Classic.
Three gents contributed 113 so once they were not in operation, wickets
would fall. This was a chance for the swing of new guy JJ to come into
play. Pleased himself bowled well, upset he missed a diving effort. A few
then wickets tumbled as Emu finally found the line that saw Curto snaffle a
caught behind. Emu snagged a few more catches before new recruit Jarrod
seized on a ball and lobbed it in to the stumps to effect a timely run out.
His fielding, combined with Dutchy and JJ who were tireless on a hot day.
Gladys also bowled some peaches, showing his tricks to suppress the score
and take a wicket or two.
Chasing 200, the opening pair fared a little Indian, but when Matt “Gladys”
Curtain strolled it, it changed. He ended on 53, a great effort from Mister
Cricket, freed from pressure of work and kids. He watched Mo denied a
certain four via an outstretched boot then dismissed for 11, Emu depart
cheaply (still scored a six), but support arrived in Robbo (29 off 25)
including 3 consecutive 4s. Dutchy who rode some short pitched balls to
secure 22 and a very sullen Dan ‘I don’t run singles’ Grigg (24 runs)
By the time Luke Curtain arrived, new guy Jarrod ran himself out and new
guy JJ had taken a ball on the wrist, breaking his ulnar bone in his
forearm. How he batted on to hit two fours is another story. As was Big
Dog, who was unable to replicate his huge score of last bat and somehow
Dutchy forgot to pass him on the ceremonial Duck. With some 35 runs
required in two and a half overs Gladys returned to smash the Labour in
Vain close, not before an incident between the before mentioned Sub
Standard captain. A dangerous ball bowled by Needling Nick and an angry
Curto saw umpire Emu mediate the situation like a Year 9 Girls Health and
Human development class.
Matt Curtain could do no more, holing out to Long On leaving Curto alone in
his teens (again) the team some 13 runs shy of the desired 200.
*Dutchy may have hurt his knee. Doubtful.
*JJ has had a plate inserted. His 8-month pregnant wife blames Luke.
*Robbo is captain next week. Nice guy!
*Matt Curtain is class.
*Even with salad you can lose friends, as Needling Nick found