• Match Facts

    MLQCC v Royal Derby Hotel

    6th March, 2011


    Fairfield Park, Fairfield


    The Big Picture

    While the rest of the world has been passing their time by watching the “World Cup” of cricket, the real thing returns on March 6 in Fairfield when the Quokkas take on the Royal Derby for their last league match of the 2010/11 YPCA season.

    The Quokkas are coming off a couple of losses, one due to being outclassed and the other due to Ed.  This is a great opportunity to finish the season on a high and give the Marquis *some* patronage on a Sunday.

    Form Guide

    Quokkas WWWLL

    Watch out for

    Jazzron seemed to be a lot more comfortable batting against the better bowlers that the Rainbow had in their arsenal and so has been moved to the top of the order for some more Chanderpaul-like runs.

    Team news

    The brains trust at Quokkas HQ* have had a few quiet weeks with Andrew Hilditch out of town, meaning there are less cries for help.  As a result they have decided to play around with the order, with an eye to the next season.  The primary outcome of this is the appointment of Pup as captain, while Bad Boy has been moved to his rightful place at first drop.

    Quokkas (possible)

    1. Jazzron
    2. Bad Boy
    3. Big Dog
    4. Pup
    5. Rev
    6. Dutchy
    7. Rob
    8. Mo
    9. Gregor
    10. J Bomb
    11. Ed

    Tbc. Cath


    “Rob and I just made it to our 30 partnership” –  Ed, 20:10 hours, 18/02/2011 (5 days and 3 hours after the match ended)

    * In response to all the fanmail on Quokkas HQ, I can confirm it is very similar to Supermans fortress of solitude, though most of the ice is confined to our martini glasses – as well as our unfeeling hearts.
  • Thanks for the opportunity of allowing me to (unconventionally) Captain the team last Sunday.  It was a great day but unfortunately we couldn’t walk away with a win… rundown as follow:

    After losing the toss (OK, there was no toss, they just asked to bat first) we found ourselves in the field.  An unconventional 4 pronged opening attack was adopted, which seemed to work in our favour.  It was a great start by ‘Bad Boy’ cracking their opening batsman in the head with the opening ball of the day and drawing blood.  Two balls later we had their Captain out caught behind, to a dubious decision from the umpire.  I think the decision even surprised the Bad Boy.  Next to bowl was high hat Mo, taking another wicket by knocking the bails off the stumps without the batsman knowing what had happened…  Pup and Gregor followed up with some tidy work, with Gregor unlucky not to take a wicket with Jazzron ‘the clouds make it hard to see’ Keeper putting down a caught behind opportunity.  Luckily we weren’t made to pay, with Bad Boy clean bowling the same batsman in the next over.  Pup bowled extremely well, taking 1/12 with his opening spell. 

    Moving further into the innings, Rev was asked to bowl the next over.  His response was that he needed to go ‘wee wees’ first and asked if I could bowl someone else first.  Instead we found him an incontinence pad, which allowed him to run on in and take a wicket from a pie with extra sauce.  It must have been the ‘mystery fieldsman’ he put in place that scared the batsman – somewhere between long on and long off.    

    We managed to bowl the team out with some tidy bowling from all, for a score of 116.  A target we thought was quite achievable.

    Special mentions on the bowling:

    Ed: 2/2

    Bad Boy: 2/6 – plus a head-hunter drawing blood

    Big Dog: 1/10

    Dutchy & Rev: both 1/11

    Special mentions on fielding:

    Rev:  The mystery fielding position

    Rev:  Sore arm so can’t field in the deep

    Rev:  I need wee wees 

    When it came to batting we sent in our resident opener Ed, along with Rob for his first time of opening.  It was fair to say it was a difficult assignment, as getting the Rainbow’s bowlers away was no easy feat.  This was reflected with a ‘not so lightening’ start of 19 runs from the first 12 overs.  A run rate of 1.6.  This left us requiring 98 runs from the final 13 overs, a required run rate of 7.5.  So one by one we all (except Bad Boy) walked out to the middle, swung the bat with ferociousness, then walked back to the sidelines with our tails between our legs.  Jazzron however put up some fight near the end with a good knock of 20 – overcoming his fear of the clouds and shoving it up the captain for putting him down at number 8.  Unfortunately we fell short of our target by 28, reaching 9/89. 

    Special mentions on the batting:

    Jazzron: 20 (two 4s)

    J Bomb: 19 (two 4s, one 6)

    Rob: 17 (three 4s)

    Gregor: 15 (one 4, one 6)

    Cat: When asked if she wanted them to slow down the bowling?  Answer:  Absolutely not.  Very Gutsy, I reckon most of us would have said yes! 

    Thanks for the game lads, was a good one that we were expecting to get belted in – but we can hold our heads high.  One final hit-out against the Derby before the BDNO, so let’s finish off with a win.

    J Bomb

  • Resplendent Quokkas

    Match Facts

    MLQCC v Rainbow Hotel

    13th February, 2011

    12.30 (be there at 12.00)

    Ramsden Street Oval, Clifton Hill


    The Big Picture

    After coming up against their first established ‘competitive’ side in the league, the Quokkas were able to get a better feeling for where they are in the competition.  Early feedback suggests that the club is unsurprised with this position.

    The Rainbow promises to be an equally tough contest, with the boys in Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo and Violet rumoured to spend their Saturdays playing club cricket.  The other rumour is that they spend their Saturdays hand washing their carefully assembled ensemble. 

    Well, it’s a rumour now.

    This is the first Quokka game since our initial hit-out in which we haven’t hosted the game, making this a Litmus test of our ability having the burden of BBQing lifted from our enormous shoulders.

    Form Guide

    Quokkas LWWWL

    Watch out for

    After noticing that Shane Watson is regarded as the best cricketer not wearing grey and maroon in the country, the Quokkas brain trust have moved Dutchy/Mason up the order to bring more run-outs and moisturising product to the top order. 

    Team news

    After spending the last few months exhaling steam in the outfield whenever he saw a field placement he didn’t like, J Bomb has been appointed captain for this game.  Expect the mantle of responsibility to rest easy.

    The response to this game has been mute with Cath, Rob and Chooka yet to confirm attendance.  As always, there are plenty of opportunities to change the order.

    The Rev has survived a net session with Mrs Rev (she only *mostly* beat the bat) on Sunday afternoon and has declared himself fit.  He is looking to have another net on late Saturday afternoon @ Edinburgh gardens if anyone wants to join.

    Quokkas (possible)

    1. Ed
    2. Rev
    3. Dutchy
    4. J Bomb (c)
    5. Gregor
    6. Mo
    7. Jazzron (wk)
    8. Big Dog
    9. Pup
    10. Horse
    11. Bad Boy
    12. 12.   Chooka  – The Enigma 

    Others – Rob Seddon, Cath


    “What about Darragh?” – Ed, on being asked who our best WAG is

    Other News

    • I am putting in a new shirt order for Gregor (m), Bad Boy (xl), Dutchy (L) and Mrs Mo (s) – let me know if I’ve missed anyone.
    • Our famous subs have gone to work and bought a team bat & set of pads and gloves;
    • Net session late Saturday afternoon in Edinburgh gardens if anyone is keen – contact the Rev;
    • Once again, subs will be $10 – this will go towards more kit & the end of year presentation night (WAGs: get your fake tan on);


Recent Comments

  • Strong.
  • Proper swing bowling that was. Pitch it up.
  • Fabulous article which made us smile in the Spanish sunshine...
  • You forgot to mention Harry getting to bowl an over aswell. ...
  • Please see point 5.