• From Captain Snipper….

    One minute we’re walking out on the field, bowl pretty good, get a bit unlucky in the field, go out to bat, don’t hit enough sixes and what feels like 10 seconds later we’ve lost the match.

    Ahhh the BDNO.

    We had some stand out moments – Monty copped it tough being peppered at deep mid wicket but kept his cool and remains a massive legend in my books.  Gaz was kept busy at deep-backward point and saved a bunch of boundaries without putting a foot wrong.  Pup affected an insane run-out off his own bowling flicking a direct hit at the non-strikers end from side-on, some credit for which must go to J-Rod who obligingly departed the field so that I could bring Pup on (thanks J-Rod).

    Rohan kept wicket tremendously and took every chance that came his way.  Jay bowled a tight line getting the most out of the flat track.  Big Dog bowled a really tidy penultimate over and claimed another scalp.  Alex tossed one up and got carted for four, then dared the batsmen to do it again and got the wicket next ball and another one the ball after that.

    Ed’s over was water-tight and also removed someone’s leg stump while Local closed out the death sharply.

    The fact that hardly any runs (maybe 2?) were scored behind square leg was testament to our good line – the stumbling block being the semi-regular drag-downs which disappeared over mid wicket.

    We were kept well in check with the bat and unfortunately just couldn’t find the boundary enough with the exception of Dutchy who made retirement in the usual quick time.  I flat batted one over square leg that missed a small child’s face by a few inches… horrific situation avoided.

    Luckily the only drama that followed was that we pretty easily lost the match.

    Sincere apologies to those who missed out on the chance to contribute with the bat namely Pup, Big Dog, Monty and Local.  Your understanding and sportsmanship was truly appreciated despite some obvious frustration.

    Also big thanks to Kathleen behind the bar and those who put in so much time and effort behind the scenes for the wild and unique event that is the BDNO.


  • Match Facts:

    Sunday, March 4, 2018

    Alfred Crescent Oval, Edinburgh Gardens
    Fitzroy North





    The Big Picture:

    The Big Day Not Out (BDNO) has been more agile than a Quokka fielder in recent seasons, moving from the end of the season to anytime where the Edinburgh Gardens is available during the Summer.


    This seasons effort has been moved to the quasi-traditional spot at the end of the season, providing the garlic sauce effect by adding a little more spice to the contest as YPCA teams battle it out for supremacy in the T10 format.


    With the ICC looking to get T10 cricket included in the Olympics, now would be a good time to get the IOC to look away at something else.




    It is with a little sadness that The Quokkas go into this game, as it bids adieu to what has been a busy Summer, but a thoroughly enjoyable one in which the squad actually won some games and really supported one another throughout (almost).


    Thanks for everything, all of you.


    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas come into this game having narrowly lost to the ANSC by about 20 runs, or the difference of their best player. Given this format is much shorter, the opportunity for good players to score 40-odd is non-existent, which works in the Quokkas favor.


    Huzzah for lack of opportunities! Bring back serfdom!



    In the Spotlight:

    Pup comes into this match after the best game of his career (that we know of), having scored 46 and bowled some crazy left-arm swing. His Runs Per Over rate this season is an incredible 3.6, which is probably a little too ridiculous.


    Snipper is Captain for the match, having been the best on ground last season. The man in the shades has “only” averaged 27 with the bat this season, but done so at a strike rate of 2.08 & with 74% of his runs coming from boundaries (44% sixes) – which is more than enough for the BDNO.


    Team News:

    Young snip-snip has a quorum of Quokkas to choose from this week, including:

    1. Ed
    2. Big Dog
    3. Dutchy
    4. Jay
    5. Alex
    6. Radar
    7. Monty
    8. Pup
    9. Snipper
    10. Local
    11. J Rod
    12. Gaz


    Pitch and Conditions:

    Autumn will truly be on show this Sunday, with a wet and windy day predicted and a high of 21 degrees. The start time of 11am may include some tough conditions and sore heads, but may help the bowlers with swing.


    Alfred Crescent Oval is notable for its small boundaries, which can appear to get mysteriously smaller once the batsmen get started.

    Screen Shot 2018-03-02 at 10.50.37 am

    Stats and Trivia:

    • This will be the Quokkas 8th attempt at winning the BDNO, this years squad arguably being the strongest since Rowdy and Gladys appeared;
    • Ed and Pup are the only players to appear in every Quokka BDNO, with Dutchy and the Big Dog having missed 1 each


  • From Captain Dutchy….

    Nerrena – build it and they will come.

    And we did (come), Again.

    There’s a serenity/chaos dichotomy in pub league cricket and its fair to say Nerrena has won the Quokkas’ hearts. It’s a field placed upon a majestic location with a view to die for. Any hipster barista in pub-league territory could only dream of the single origin milk/cream produced in these parts and wouldn’t know what to do when confronted with the majestic view from the Nerrena oval, on the crest of a hill overlooking a landscape somehow escaped by the Heidelberg school, who quite frankly couldn’t be farked traveling beyond the old metro zone 1 train ticket reaches.

    Not bad

    Not bad

    The Nerrena game has become folklore amongst the quokka tribe, not just for the challenge, scenery and view but the pre-game fish n chips night-before tradition (entering its second year). The quokka tribe has entered an aggressive recruitment plus breeding program. If anyone needs to understand ‘cute’ please witness Radar and Caitlin dote over the quokkas future No3 batsman and opening bowler!

    A last minute change with our leading strike bowler and trophy promulgate, Big Dog, needing to go home as his father had passed  back in Ireland – brought a sobering reality to proceedings.

    And then onto game day…

    The quokkas went with an aggressive (confused?) turn-up-before-the-opposition-tactic, Albeit only half of us. The inevitable last minute logistical confusion ensued as some had gigs the night before and others were still asking Siri where ‘Near Enya’ was…

    Some context…

    The Nerrena lads have previously spanked the quokkas with their mix of older guile and youth. This year the yoof faces changed but still were impressive (almost to the point I would say the best Nerrena we have faced!).

    But there was a ‘plan’. A ‘chaos plan’.

    The Quokkas bowled first.

    This was to be a theory derived in Dutchy’s deluded mind that cricket doesn’t apply to pub-league. Reactionary field placing was gone, traditional field placing were verboten and Bowlers would be backed rather than reactionary. And so a big thank you to the Nerrena batsmen for making that plan look ok.

    And to say the quokkas bowling stepped up was an understatement, I am not exaggerating to state it was one of the best ever Quokkas bowling performances to date. Ed, Alex, Pete, Jay and Radar swung, moved and bowled tight with Ed, Alex and Radar knocking the stumps down. And then, the secret weapon Rolly was introduced. First ball. Skied to Rev. Catch taken.

    Paramedics were called… mainly for the Quokkas…

    Things were looking good for the Quokkas as the Nerrena lads were mistakenly playing cricket whilst the Quokkas were playing the short game. A statement that may never be repeated re Quokkas bowling is that no single over contained more than one boundary. No, seriously!

    Snipper bowled with one arm and was unfairly bombarded with catches on his injured side. Ed was almost eviscerated by a ‘chance’ at square leg and in total the quokkas dropped approx 6 (sometimes brutal) catches but those numbers don’t tell a true tale.

    Put simply. The Quokkas excelled. Cath (with Piper), under trying circumstances, had made the trip and came on to bowl. The instructions were simple, “bowl as high as and loopy as Darragh does”. Within her first three deliveries she almost had two wickets and honestly could have finished the day with three,

    Whilst the Nerrena lads were swishing, there wasn’t much runs and despite the forced retirements of faces their total got up to 139.

    And now the Quokkas were faced with a conundrum before unseen.

    The usual 25 overs historically has seen us staring down 170-200+ totals. The choke was on!

    But Nerrena had a rather annoying battery of young bowlers who looked like they knew of this mysterious ‘line and length’ white whale some have spoken of, yet rarely harpooned, in pub league.

    After a short break whereupon the quokkas tried to mentally readjust to the possibility of a gettable target, Rev and Radar (R&R) headed out. Now the Rev is a new beast this season and has been spotted on occasion playing ‘shots’. And yet somehow went out despite looking good. Radar is one of my ‘moneyball’ players. flashy bat that likes it coming at him fast and sending it away faster, unfortunately sucked into a stumping but had the scoreboard ticking early…

    Enter Jay. After checking Rev wasn’t at the other end, he yet again played some great scoring shots and kept the runs coming. There’s thirties in his future soon…

    But soon the fireworks and soundtrack pumped across the landscape  as the ‘single origin Local show’ waltzed out and immediately introduced the backward sweep to great effect for a boundary.

    Jay departed after some quick runs to let Alex get involved. As if it wasn’t enough that he was capable of bowling some seriously awesome leg breaks, it would not be over stated to say Alex has been nothing short of amazing with the willow this season.

    I mean, he does cheat; footwork should be discouraged…

    Snipper still managed to bat effectively despite being one sided and Ed and myself ticked over the last few runs to take victory.

    Personal highlights:

    • Watching Peter show his lad (Radar) and grandson he still has it!
    • Watching the confusion on Quokkas faces with field placings that can change between overs!
    • Piper teaching new emojis on the sidelines
    • Our best bowlers being pretty much all of us!

    It was fairly quickly made sober to realise the Big Dog wasn’t here to witness a first, historic win for the “O’Donovan-Gannon’ Trophy.

    A huge thank you to the Nerrena crew for hosting a great day which we are already look forward to next year’s edition.

    Love seeing the new young faces come through the Nerrena team. Big thanks to locals Will and cohorts for filling in whilst the Quokka last few rolled up.

  • From Cap’n Monty:

    What a great Game between the Quokkas and the ANSC!

    The toss was had and won by us (thankfully) and we sent it the All Nations guys for a bat. Luckily for us the we had the ball swinging and seaming and everyone managed to bowl good line and length, a rare treat for the quokkas. I managed to make the first breakthrough with a wayward delivery down leg which caught the back of the bat and was held on to in the deep by pup. The batsmen crossed and I had the other opener caught behind very next ball, on a hatrick!! We bought the field in and had 3 slips, a first for pub cricket, and I was belted back over my head.

    Enter Dutchy: Some brilliant spin bowling and some excellent keeping by Radar had the batsmen stumped as he chased one down the wicket on the last ball of the over. His next delivery yielded the very same result, on another hat-trick!!  Unfortunately no luck on the third ball but the Quokkas were in good nick thats for sure.

    Some excellent batting by the ANSC got them in a solid position toward the end of the innings and left us with a decent but chase-able total to reach to win the game.

    Radar and local opened and got us off to a solid start before Radar was clean bowled by a great delivery. Enter Pup. Pup played some great strokes early in his innings including a very nice cut shot for 6. Local departed soon after. We then lost a string of wickets quickly and were looking wobbly. Pup retired and I took his position. The first bit of bat I’d gotten on anything in 3 games was hit straight in the air and I was gone as soon as I was in.

    It was up to Snipper and Alex to save the game and we were looking good until Snipper departed, sending pup back in to finish the innings. A strong fight between Alex and Pup wasn’t enough to save the day as the ANSC came out on top to take a much deserved win!!

    All in all a great game of cricket.


  • Match Facts

    Ramsden Street Oval,

    Ramsden Street,

    Clifton Hill


    Start Time



    The Big Picture

    And so the penultimate Quokka day of the Summer is upon us with this, the match against All Nations Social Cricket (ANSC).


    The genesis of this match came from the games that The Quokkas used to play against the Asylum Seeker Resource Centre (ASRC) which came to an ending as untimely as any of my batting innings, though more due to the volunteer who organised their team leaving due to work commitments, rather than one of my brain fades.


    The ANSC has picked up where the ASRC cricket program left off, providing a means for asylum seekers and refugees to access the game, and all the physical and mental health benefits that this brings – as well as engagement with the broader community.


    Indeed this game is more a celebration of what the game can bring, rather than a demonstration of the game itself, which is a good thing considering the strong Quokka involvement.


    Here’s looking forward to a fun match.




    Form Guide

    Unbelievably, The Quokkas are coming into this match having won their last two.


    In The Spotlight:

    Monty returns to the field of dreams (Ramsden St) this weekend for his first crack at the Captaincy. Having shown that he obviously played quite a bit of junior cricket through his reticence to swing wildly at every ball and the ability to bowl on the pitch, it will be interesting to see whether he goes with 4 or 5 in the slips cordon.


    The BIG DOG returns to the side this week with this seasons leading wicket takers award firmly in his sights. The soul of The Quokkas is sure to surprise the ANSC with his bowling technique, here’s hoping the deep midwicket fielders can surprise the rest of us by holding a few catches and handing the large hound the trophy.

    Artists impression of batsmen facing The Dog

    Artists impression of batsmen facing The Dog


    Team News:

    With another 8 months without cricket staring them in the face with an expression as lifeless as the MCG pitch, its been all hands up in response to the call for availability at the start of the week.


    The squad (at the time of writing) is:


    1. Local
    2. VP (vp)
    3. Gaz
    4. Roley
    5. Pup (vc)
    6. Jay
    7. J Rod
    8. Snipper
    9. Radar
    10. Big Dog
    11. Monty (c)
    12. Alex


    Pitch and Conditions:

    Ramsden Street Oval (aka. Revs-den) has been a happy hunting ground for The Quokkas for many a season, as well as their preferred training venue.


    With wide boundaries and short grass, the ground lets both the belters and the nudgers score runs, as well as open up many more opportunity for (dropped) catches.


    Our last match their ended up not being there, but another place that wasn’t there, so we will be very happy to be there where it is.


    The forecast for Sunday is a potentially damp 20 degrees, so there may be some swing early and better batting conditions later. A good toss to win.


    Stats and Trivia:

    • Dutchy is only 30 runs off 200 for the season, and 35 off one thousand career runs, which is quite remarkable really and quite a credit to him;
    • Jay is sitting on 17 career wickets, a casual 3-wicket haul will bring him into the elite group of 20 wicket takers. Given he averages 0.4 wickets per over, he will need to channel his inner Chef (0.94 WPO);
    • Snipper is only 20 runs off 400 career runs for the Quokkas, given he averages 47.5, he should get there this weekend if given the chance. Only 5 other Quokkas have hit more than 400 runs
    • Alex is currently leading the team for balls faced this season, having faced 17.5 overs, narrowly ahead of Ed 15.8
    • Ed is leading the team in legal deliveries for the season with 84, narrowly ahead of the reborn tweaker Dutchy, who is on 78. Of course, The Rev has the most number of total deliveries with 839


  • Match Facts:

    VBCA Grounds,

    454 Glenferrie Rd,



    Sunday, Feb 18


    Start Time:



    The Big Picture:

    This match is the second-leg of this seasons bipedal series between the VBCA and The Quokkas, with the VBCA taking out the first match earlier this season (which was a warm up for them ahead of Nationals).


    The last match was relatively one-sided, The Quokkas happy just to get the majority of a team on the park.


    This match, though, is a little different. The Quokkas have a full XI available at the time of writing, meaning there should be possibly (maybe) 8 ready by Sunday morning.


    The games against the VBCA are always good fun and played with a great spirit, at least once the bar is opened at midday.


    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas are actually coming off their first Tour win EVER, having beaten Nerrena in Nerrena in a tightly contested match last weekend.


    This is a matter that should illicit wonder as much as it does concern, I‘m pretty sure a Quokkas away win is one of the four horsemen of the Apocalypse.


    Taken in context though, an away win won’t have too much impact on this game as the nuances of the rocking & rolling ball take hold.


    Similar to touring games, The Quokkas are traditionally pretty poor at Blind Cricket matches, but perhaps all that is about to change too.


    In The Spotlight:

    J Rod returns for his annual Captaincy stint, fresh from the birth of his second child, full of vim and vigor. And sleep.


    ‘The Rod’ has been known to get so worked up at games that others can tell he is actually breathing, so it will be interesting to see how he approaches captaining a match when the soft, shaded outfields of Kooyong are available.


    The Quokkas are also hoping to welcome back Gaz, who has been missing in 2018 due to a combination of sickness and cardigan-related issues. We all look forward to seeing how the casual cover-driver handles the rolled ball.


    We also see the return of the only Quokka to get paid for appearing, albeit with what he calls “fizzy drink” and “twisted up chips”.

    Sledging went to unexpected places too

    “I want Twisties!”


    Team News:

    The XI (at the time of writing) is:

    1. Ed
    2. Dutchy
    3. Snipper
    4. Radar
    5. J Rod (c)
    6. Rev
    7. Roley
    8. Jay
    9. Pup
    10. Gaz
    11. Maxy


    Pitch and Conditions:

    The VBCA grounds are a real delight, with soft outfields, lots of shade and the comforts of the commentary box readily available. The slight slope to the ground also creates some challenges for the bowlers, similar to bowling into v with the wind in non-blind cricket.


    Who in The Quokkas will be their Peter Siddle?

    Artists impression of Peter Siddle

    Artists impression of Peter Siddle


    The BOM is expecting a top of 22 on Sunday, so it should be a very comfortable day out.


    Stats and Trivia:

    • This will be the 6th match between the VBCA and The Quokkas (someone should really organise a trophy), the only Quokka to have played in all of them being The Rev;
    • J Rod, Dutchy and Big Dog have all played in 4 VBCA games;









  • Match Facts:

    Nerrena Recreation Reserve,

    Nerrena Hall Road

    Nerrena, Gippsland, VIC

    Australia, The World


    Sunday, February 11


    Start Time:

    1pm ???


    The Big Picture:

    This will be the third match between Nerrena and The Quokkas, and the first time we are playing for the O’Donovan – Gannon Trophy. The O’Donovan- Gannon Trophy is surely in the top 10 of Irish cricketing trophies, so there is plenty to play for there.


    Samuel Beckett would be amused, or possibly bemused.


    This match is an annual fixture that The Quokkas look forward to with great anticipation, the Nerrena ground being as beautiful a pitch as you will find in Gippsland, much like the representatives of the team itself.


    Despite all this, and perhaps unsurprisingly, The Quokkas have never won in Nerrena; which possibly explains why we keep getting invited back.


    Last years game was great fun; The Big Dog got his opposite number out in the first over of the game, Tuesday hit some handy runs, The Rev knocked himself out while fielding, everyone had a laugh at that and a general good time. Oh yeah, we also raised some cash for Beyond Blue.


    Form Guide:

    After starting the season in imperious form, normal programming has returned on Channel Quokka, with 3 losses in a row.


    The efforts and attitude have remained high though, and some players (Radar, Dutchy, Alex and Ed) are arguably in career-best form. Should these 4 keep up their form (and the rest not play too badly), The Quokks are a good chance to push for a win here.


    In the Spotlight:

    After debuting against Nerrena in our first match against them, Jay, has gone on to play pretty much every game since, whether they be in Sri Lanka, Rottnest Island or Clifton Hill.


    One of these guys has taken 17 wickets. The other has taken 15.


    In his 16 YPCA games, Jay has taken 17 wickets at 16.12 and scored 254 runs at 25.4. All of this has been done with impeccable technique that speaks of afternoons spent at proper cricket training and an application that is possibly wasted at our level.


    More than this, though, has been Jays contribution to the team. Always positive and supportive, Jay has brought the spirits and the performances of the team up with him.


    Team News:

    It’s obviously been a long season, as we’ve had to scramble to get an XI together for the first time this season. While many weeks this season have started with 14 or so available for the coming weekend, this week started with horse trading and has ended with a high likelihood of a full squad.


    Radar has managed to convince his Dad to play, which will be a real boon to the teams bowling stocks, as well as the general level of cool in the team. Can anyone else’s Dad casually talk about working with Sugarman?


    Yeah, thought so.


    Snipper is scheduled to make his long-awaited return to the team this Sunday too, though musical commitments may provide an obstacle.


    The XI (at the time of writing) is:

    1. Local
    2. Radar
    3. Dutchy (c)
    4. Jay
    5. Alex
    6. Ed
    7. Big Dog
    8. Pete Sforcina
    9. Snipper
    10. Roley
    11. Cat *
    12. Rev *


    * Cat will probably bat & Rev will probably field for her (this way he cant run anyone out – on either team)


    Pitch and Conditions:

    The Nerrena Recreation Ground is an absolute Quokka favourite and has an average rating of 5 stars on the Quokka Travel Guide**. With the green, undulating hills of Gippsland making up the background and pine plantations neighboring it, Nerrena is an empowering place for the spirit and the senses – kind of like the opposite to India.


    The weather forecast is for a cool 22 on Sunday with a chance of rain, here’s hoping that the wet stuff stays away long enough to get a game in.


    ** May not exist


    Stats and Trivia:

    • Local is only 21 runs off hitting 100 for this season, which he should do rather quickly as long as he stays in. His strike rate for the season is Darcy Short-esque at 1.61
    • Roley got his first Quokka YPCA runs in the last match, scoring 14 in fairly quick time after deciding that hitting boundaries involved a lot less running that singles
    • Captain Dutchy is only 35 runs off ONE THOUSAND career YPCA runs for The Quokkas. Given he is averaging 56.7 for the season (at a strike rate of 2.02), he could get there in a couple of overs on Sunday
  • From Captain Alex:

    Woke up 11am.

    James said he’d pick me up.

    Got a strong latte.

    James picked me up midday-ish.

    Got another latte.

    On root to Ramsden Street Ed says we got booted.

    Stand by for a new ground.

    Ed sorted out a ground near the Yarra.

    Grass was long and short and the pitch was notably narrow.

    Vote to Ed for sorting out new ground.

    BBQ set up no worries.

    Cones dropped.

    Quokkas fielding first.

    I asked everyone to pitch it right up at the toes.

    To bowl em.

    To avoid short balls which traditionally get hit for runs.

    Opening bowlers didn’t bowl as good as usual.

    Bowled short.

    Got hit for heaps o runs.

    That’s essentially it.

    Ground was Gallipoli-esque and ball was soap.

    Dog didn’t mind.

    Held catches.


    Even Ed stuffed a few up.

    Bowled myself.

    Realised the bowling was hard yakka.

    Narrow pitch was crippling.

    I understood.

    I bowled shit.

    At drinks we were up against it.

    BUT – we had a great attitude going on.

    Big talk in the field.

    Heaps of encouragement.


    We decided we would try to get through the overs real quick in the second half.

    I reckon that worked well.

    Rohan kept really well.

    Kept rolling the ball back the bowler real quick after each bowl.

    The batsmen were caught off guard.

    Pup bowled like a legend.

    Even after being flattened by a large bloke with no sense of spacial awareness.

    Ed bowled good.

    Local bowled good.

    Dutchy bowled real good.

    Fielding remained a challenge and we let a few through.

    We really kept the run rate down toward the end.

    Pressure was high.

    We walked off at the the end of the innings like a bunch of legends. We supported the hell out of each other while under the pump. It wasn’t an easy day to be captain. But an easy day to be proud of the Quokkas attitude.

    We needed 220ish to win. lol.

    Dutch and Pup opened.

    Dutch got out.

    Dylan came in.

    Dylan blocked it to a fielder.

    Called yes when he was 3 paces from the bowlers end and took a few extra skips past Pup.

    Bowler rolls ball to keeper.

    Keeper knocks bails off.

    Rainbow think it’s all pretty funny.

    Pup surprised to see Rev his end o pitch.

    Rev stands his ground.

    Pup displays an impressive feat of maturity and martyrdom decides to solve the stale mate by leaving the field.

    Top order collapsed.

    Local and Dog looked good but saw red and got unlucky.

    I went in at 6.

    Over 8 maybe?

    We were probably on 60ish.

    I hit excellent cricket shots and retired.

    Then Ed did the same.

    Rolley did a good job of holding up an end.

    I came back in and batted like Brian Lara.

    Then I got out which was shitty because we could have won if I had of kept my head and batted on.

    Ed continued to bat like a hero.

    We lost.

    But only by 20ish.

    Which is incredible.

    As captain I was so impressed with the Quokkas attitude.

    We faced a better team and almost got there.

    We (almost) maintained a positive and supportive attitude all day.

    Then we went to the Rainbow, proud as punch.

    See you in Nerrena for some quality Quokkas cricket. 

  • Match Facts:

    Ramsden Street Oval, Clifton Hill

    Sunday, January 21


    Start Time:



    The Big Picture:



    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas nearly snatched victory from the jaws of defeat last week against The Royston in a game they should have lost by a lot more. The ability to recover from 5 for 60-not-much at drinks in their batting innings to post 170-odd and then nearly defend it was a great effort.


    Batting first certainly was tough on a very slow pitch and outfield & The Quokkas showed great resilience in making it into a game.


    I do make a lot of jokes on here about traditionally bad form and lack of success, but the men in maroon have been really taking up the fight this season; active in the field, supporting each other and having some fun with it.


    More of that and there is no reason why we can’t get another W this weekend.


    Quokkas: WWLLWLL


    In the spotlight:

    The prodigal son, Pup, returns this week for his annual match that allows him to qualify for the BDNO. That’s not fair, Pup has played this season, but hasn’t  batted – so does it count? Given that I didn’t really bat for my first 15 years as a Quokka, I will say his efforts do count.


    Pup, seen here doing stuff

    Pup is in synchronous career form, having bowled 60 overs for 20 wickets at a cost of 300 runs at an average of 15 at 5RPO. It takes me back to those heady first days at cricket stats school. Wild times, let me tell you. If anyone remembers what happened that night after we stayed up discussing the advantages of the mean average versus the median average, let me know.


    Team News:

    1. The Rev
    2. Big Dog
    3. Pup
    4. Local
    5. Ed
    6. Roley
    7. Radar
    8. Alex (c)
    9. VP
    10. Dutchy
    11. Monty


    Pitch and Conditions:

    Last weeks game was played in what can only be described as “Melbourne” conditions; starting in some coolish-damp weather before the sun came out and dried everything up. Its always a great excuse to blame the weather and conditions in deciding the result of a Cricket match, and that’s exactly what I’m doing here.


    Its going to be a hot week this week but will cool down to a respectable 29 on Sunday so at least it should be an even contest in that regard.


    Ramsden Street has been a happy hunting ground for the Quokkas in recent seasons and is located deliciously close to The Gasometer, so here’s hoping we make the quick trip back to the big red car Sunday evening.


    Stats and Trivia

    • Last weeks efforts saw Radar pass 400 career YPCA runs for The Quokkas, making him the 5th highest run scorer of all time. This has been done in 29 innings at an average of 17, with 48 fours and 5 sixes. Congratulations Radar!
    • This will be Locals 25th YPCA match for The Quokkas, to go along with his 4 BDNOs, 3 T20s and 1 VBCA match
    • Ed is only 21 runs away from 900 career YPCA runs, and given he is averaging 94 for the season, he should get there this week – if given the opportunity



  • Match Facts:

    Alphington Park, Vere Street, Alphington

    January 14, 2018


    Start Time:



    The Big Picture:

    A very happy new year to all. With a new year comes new hopes and, inevitably, failed resolutions. And so it is with The Quokkas, who managed to win 3 of their 5 games at the end of 2017 and so go into 2018 with a new – perhaps temporary – confidence.


    The Quokkas ended 2017 in hitherto unknown form; holding catches, scoring (lots of) runs and taking wickets. Much like working on the Death Star, it was pretty fun at the time but you definitely got the feeling it wouldn’t end well.

    Artists impression of The Quokkas intuition

    Artists impression of The Quokkas intuition


    The Royston are something of an unknown entity as the Quokkas have never played them before. That means little for The Quokkas as they get beaten by unknowns, as well as knowns, regularly.


    Form Guide:

    The Quokkas have already started 2018 with an impromptu game against the VBCA to assist them with some practice ahead of the All Abilities Carnival. The game was a loss for the Quokkas, but that is hardly the point.


    A scan of The Quokkas results from this looks more like morse code than anything else:

    Quokkas: WWLLWL


    In the Spotlight:

    It’s been a long-time coming, but the co-founder of the Quokkas; Skip, will be making his debut for the Australian team this weekend.

    Yes, I could have found a better picture

    Yes, I could have found a better picture


    Originally flown over for back up for Ben Stokes, the Skipper has been released by the ECB as it seems the role of drunken larrikin has already been filled within the team. Also, he couldn’t punch his way out of a wet paper bag.


    Not sighted by the Aussie Quokka lads since his majestic Century at Galles Test Ground (that’s right), we are all looking forward to a big knock from Skip here.


    Team News:

    The ebbs and fortunes of team selection continue this week as we don’t have 14 available at the start of the week, which could be dicey as all the ‘reserve’ players have all ended up going into the starting 11 by game day so far this season.


    The XI at the time of writing is:

    1. Skip
    2. Jay
    3. Chef
    4. Ed
    5. Dutchy
    6. Big Dog
    7. Alex
    8. Monty
    9. VP
    10. Local
    11. Radar (c)
    12. Rev


    Pitch and Conditions:

    Alphington Park is a Quokka favorite. Seemingly permanently soft, flat and green outfields, a picturesque white pavilion and a car park almost a safe distance from the middle (thanks Dutchy for “adjusting” my Subaru).


    We are expecting an English Summers day on Sunday; a few clouds and a top of 23, so it should be a cracker.


    Stats and Trivia:

    • This will be Eds 50th YPCA match, the bearded one is quite the Quokka legend with 846 career YPCA runs (at 32.54) and 39 YPCA wickets (at 18.69) – congrats Eddie;
    • Jay in on track to be the most run out player this season, here’s wishing him slow heels for Sunday;
    • The Big Chef missed out on a bat in his last game so is still 11 runs off getting to 250 YPCA runs for The Quokkas, here’s hoping the big kiwi can get the job done quickly;
    • This seasons leading wicket-taker race is currently a non-sexy 4-way between Big Dog, Dutchy, Jay and the VP – will this match see the winner scream to the front like Usain Bolt, or watch the others fall over in front of him like Steven Bradbury?
    Yes, I could have found a better picture

    Not Steven Bradbury or Usain Bolt





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Recent Comments

  • Strong.
  • Proper swing bowling that was. Pitch it up.
  • Fabulous article which made us smile in the Spanish sunshine...
  • You forgot to mention Harry getting to bowl an over aswell. ...
  • Please see point 5.